Out in the Open

Hi All,

Today I want to talk about behaviors. We all have to be accountable for what we do. We have choices and we make them. Sometimes we suffer, sometimes others suffer. I have made a lot of poor and some bad choices in my life. If I hurt someone in the process, I tried to apologize and make restitution where necessary. That is God's way. It is not always easy, but it is always necessary.

There have been a few issues in my family that will come to light in this blog and a lot of it now has to do with pride. People have made bad choices but have refused to acknowledge them or apologize for them. And because of that, relationships have been injured and are unable to be repaired. Before I proceed, let me share some of my poor choices.

To my knowledge, I have done nothing of personal injury to my sister or brothers. I have one sister 7 years my senior and two brothers, 4 and 5 years my senior. My sister is Sandy. My brothers are Stanley and Steve. As I said I have done nothing to my knowledge to hurt them. I did  however, steal from my mother. When I was twelve, I stole a handful of coins from my mother's coin can so I could go to the movies with my friends. To be honest, it may have been two handfuls. But I did something more.

When I went to nursing school, I had two children. My oldest, Duray, was eight and Aaron was 1 year. I was in school full time and I worked part-time weekends. I received State benefits to supplement. I had no car. Those 3 years were tough. So when the credit card company sent me an application for a credit card in my mother's name, I forged her signature and sent it back. They sent me a credit card and I used it. Although my INTENTION was to pay it on time until I paid it off, that is not what happened. Eventually I defaulted on the payments and my mother found out.

I honestly cannot remember how much I put on the card, but I would guess $2000 or less. Granted I hurt my mother's good credit, of which I know she was very proud. I cannot recall exactly how that confrontation went, but I would guess I was viewed as a criminal, because that is the only reason I could fathom that my mother would team against me when it came to custody of my youngest son. But we will discuss all of the custody issues later....ALL of them.

The bottom line is, I did apologize to my mother and some years later, I made restitution of the money I owed her...And if I am mistaken in that I did not pay that debt in full, I will.

That is what you do when you make bad choices, recognize your mistakes, regret them and want to make it right. That is not what you do when you think you are still right, even when you are wrong!